“Everyone wants a fairytale, but the reality is what sinks the ship!” If you have been surfing online any app exclusively designed for people with disabilities looking for a perfect match, you should always be realistic or else, the experience can turn out to be disappointing to begin with. You need to be true to yourself and should be clear about your purpose of joining the app. Is it to find a serious relationship? A companion? A friend? Or finding someone to just talk to? If like me, you are also looking for a serious relationship or a potential life partner online, then the following tips can come in handy for you!
One of the key signs in the search for your perfect match is to ensure that you aren’t in touch with anybody who makes you feel uncomfortable. Although, it’s a little tricky to feel uncomfortable through a mobile screen, yet it’s extremely possible to feel that way when you’re a woman and somebody keeps sending you inappropriate messages. But, you should not worry! Online dating app and websites are extremely cautious of user safety and you can block the person directly from the app and never speak with them ever again. You should feel safe and comfortable with the person that you’ve been talking to online if you are looking for a serious relationship that could lead to marriage.
- Connecting on a personal level
Being matched on the dating app for disabled people is the first step for you, there is a need for a connecting with each other on personal level, too. It could be anything based on your shared interests for same music band or the love both of you share for dessert or dogs. Connecting on a shared hobby or interest will help you bond with your match which is positive for your tentative relationship.
- Personalities should match
Do not blindly follow the myth that opposites attract. It might be true for some but not when it comes to online dating for disabled people. If a person is loud and vocal about their thoughts and you are an introvert, things could get tricky at times. It is essential that your personality gels with that of your perfect match and help you look beyond the physical aspects of a relationship. This is why I always advise meeting your matches’ offline at any accessible venue in your city. This would give you a better idea of your match and the in-person connection can be a great indicator of where your relationship stands.
- Age group
We might have evolved a lot and become more open minded but dating without setting any apt preferences for a partner is something a lot of people still don’t feel comfortable with. If you’re one of those people who isn’t bothered with the other person’s age, then kudos to you but if you are somebody to whom the age of your perfect match matters, be real with yourself and accept that. Look for somebody online within your age bracket or something that you are comfortable with. Similar age groups make it easier to understand and gel with each other!
- Inclusion is key!
Don’t restrict yourself in your choice of a partner or companion! Inclusion is the key for people with disabilities and you should feel comfortable connecting with your match bereft of any pre-conceived notions about anything. Several studies have proved that differently-abled people are some of the most compassionate, understanding and fiercely independent people and make the best life partners. So, go ahead and match without any doubt or discomfort.
(Anjali found her life partner on Inclov app in a true instance of Inclusive Love. Read her story here)
- Accept your needs
Everybody has different needs and desires and expectations from their perfect match found online and in today’s fast changing world, we want somebody who not only understands them but also supports us. For someone with a physical disability, you would want your online match to be in sync with your disability. Similarly, anyone with a mental disability or a learning disability, needs to be very careful about their preferences for a partner. There are only a few inclusive dating/matchmaking apps where you can find a partner with or without disability. Hence, prefer such apps more than the regular ones!
- Be realistic!
The most important thing to keep in mind is to know what you’re looking for and to be realistic with your wants and needs. Don’t start online dating thinking it is the be-all and end-all of your social life, be prepared for whatever comes your way! Be honest with what you’re looking for in a match and don’t settle for any less in any way.